The complete spectrum of unpleasant emotions, including anger, fear, disappointment, jealousy, aggravation, bitterness, resentment, envy, and fears, are frequently triggered by unmet expectations.
Remorse, grief, sorrow, shame, and melancholy are all emotions brought on by unmet expectations from the past. Future expectations that are projected but not satisfied lead to depressive, anxious, inadequate, impatient, and hopeless feelings. You may consult Dr. R.K.Suri, the best clinical psychologist in Dwarka, South-West Delhi, if you think you are facing such issues.
If you didn’t have expectations, you would just cope with situations as they arose. Because you wouldn’t be making comparisons and experiences to your expectations of them, your judgment of things would be more objective.
It would be much simpler to accept what is if there were no expectations. And you would be more content. The human mind cannot function independently of expectations. You unconsciously expect that events will proceed in the same manner as they did in the past. You have the chance to transform your expectations into something more supportive when you take the time to slow down and become aware of them.
Say you want your lover to behave a certain way. Attempting to influence or control others to suit your needs will only serve to sour the relationship. You may anticipate them to be precisely like they always have been and be good with that rather than expecting them to be different and getting upset when they aren’t. They would want to do things that would make you pleased because they would feel more welcomed by you. They may then begin acting more in line with your preferences.
It’s amusing how that functions, but it does. The likelihood that the other person will change into more of what you’re seeking for increases as you accept them as they are. Though it doesn’t always work, it does so more frequently than you may imagine.
You can be happier in any case since your expectations have been met. It’s up to you to choose whether you have expectations that will regularly make you unhappy or expectations that will make you happier.
These kinds of unrealistic or misleading expectations prevent us from pursuing the things in life that are important to us. For instance, you could not take risks that could help you improve if you have the unreasonable assumption that making mistakes is unacceptable.
Expectations that are rigidly unrealistic. They don’t give us or others the flexibility we need to adapt to changing situations. Even though the expectations appear reasonable, just, and practical, your experience shows that they can’t always be fulfilled.
Additionally, your expectations may result in more issues than they resolve.
For instance, you might expect your children to behave themselves at all times, but in trying to enforce this expectation, you end up dealing with disappointment, disputes with your children, and mental health issues.
The most common methods of coping with unmet expectations are:
- Distractions include adding to your to-do list, scheduling reflective time in between other activities, drowning yourself in work, or becoming fanatical about a hobby or exercising.
- Numbing the pain can be accomplished by unhealthy eating or drinking, extended workdays, unnecessary spending, binge-watching TV, drug use, prolonged internet or social media use, or excessive exercise.
- Being strong is putting on a strong-looking mask and pushing through the sensations that the problem has produced.
- Pep talks: Making use of techniques like positive affirmations while denying your own emotions.
- The “next big thing” is something you believe will improve everything, such as a new job, city, home, relationship, or car.
- Bypassing your negative thoughts spiritually means searching right away for the lesson or blessing.
It can be challenging to let go of unreasonable expectations, even when they bring us down.
This is in part because we think having high expectations for ourselves is beneficial. We believe that these goals encourage and excite us to fulfill our ambitions. We fear that if we don’t have any exaggerated ambitions, we’ll just “sit around and not meet any goals.”
Expectations that are too high may also feel protective. We can be concerned that if we lower our standards, others would take advantage of us and harm us.However, we don’t require impossibly high standards to guarantee our safety. Instead, she emphasized the value of putting thoughts aside and concentrating on the here and now. Feel free to consult Dr. R.K.Suri, the best clinical psychologist in Dwarka, South-West Delhi, if you need such sessions.
